Steph doesn't like me. Steph doesn't trust me. There's no 1% chance of me someday succeeding to win her affection. And while that empowers me to move on, the process is painful.

Before I rant and complain about my current state, I'm sure many of you are asking how I finally acknowledge this. After all, a guy who kept on trying for three years seems like a person deluding himself. I knew from the start that I had little chance. After all, who could love a person such as myself? But somewhere, once upon a time, Steph was comfortable around me and trusted me. We talked and we shared a lot of things. There was concern. And while that was gone a long time ago, I had always hoped that I could rekindle the tie.

Here I am at the present. No hope, no chance, no success. I guess it hit me when I she declined attending my birthday celebration for the third time. That was weeks ago. As usual, there's the excuse of being busy, and while true, she somehow finds the time for other stuff. *sigh*

Well yesterday as I was headed to meet Caleb, my carpool, I ran into Coni. It's the second time I saw her wearing a skirt, the first time during Physics class when she was dared by one of her friends. Anyway, she had an oral defense hence the outfit and since she didn't want to commute wearing a skirt, she called up someone she can hitch a ride with, whom I am presuming is Steph since she's the only one Coni actually hitches a ride with, their homes being a few streets away.

So what does that story have to do with me? Well, it's been some time now since I've been asking Steph's mobile number. All her friends know it but whenever I ask, she just gives me the reason that the phone isn't hers and that she's sharing it with her sister. Not that I couldn't know the number since it's easy for me to ask one of her friends but I want her to tell it to me, to actually trust me with it (not that I'm going to pester her or something). I mean I do know her house number and I rarely call. I'm really not pushing the issue since I know that she doesn't want to give it to me and accept that fact. Which only supports my belief that I have no hope and no chance.

I guess the most difficult part is that I have no motivation in life anymore. Steph was my muse, my inspiration whenever I succumb to weakness. Now I don't even have that.

And I'm always at the brink of temptation. I mean there are a lot of beautiful girls out there that I really find attractive. And sometimes, it's just so tempting to ask one of them out on a date. Except that I know I'll hurt their feelings and what I'm really looking for is personality, not just good looks. Not that the girls I know don't have a good personality but it's more of the specific personality I'm looking for. And since I'm really a weird person, my type is rare.

Of course there's also the irony that people I'm not in love with have feelings for me. There are homosexuals who have crushes on me, to my chagrin, and really beautiful girls who have great personalities but I know I'm not in love with and will hurt their feelings if I pursue the relationship. And it's actually quite hard to decline them (the girls... the homosexuals are easy... and Arcina dear, I am straight straight straight!). And as tempting it is for me to tell the story of that incident which happened a few years back, I won't.

Anyway, people shouldn't be too worried about me. I'm still writing, ain't I? And I'm not sulking as I used to do. You probably won't even notice it when you bump into me. And I'm broke, so there won't be impulses to treat other people out in a vain attempt to make them smile.

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Perhaps one of the reasons why my despair is still lurking and why I'm hesitant to read Donaldson is because the damned book is contributing to my emotional state. Covenant is dark dark dark, and takes angst and internal struggle to a new level. Great, just what I need. But knowing me, I'm not the type of person to let go of a book unfinished. *sigh*

Well, off to update my links...

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*gasp* Ateneo won. 77-70. It's hard to believe but it actually happened. Considering DLSU has Mike Cortez, the guy I was referring to earlier who makes three point shots, intercepts, and great at drawing out fouls from the opposing team, and that DLSU has a better overall free throw percentage and steals, I guess I can only be grateful Ateneo's team is well spread out. I mean two of its three-pointers were fouled out yet they managed to maintain their lead and win the game.

Oh yeah, I know now what buzzer beater means, which is also the new manga series by Slam Dunk's creator (forgot his name).

Anyway, spent the entire day at home, resting and reading Defenders of the Faith. I'm still not up to reading the other books I bought, including the one I'm reading now, The Chronicles of Thomas Covenant. Chanty also happened to be sending me text messages, asking how the game went, which is fair enough since I did the same two games ago. =P

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It's currently half-time at the UAAP finals. Ateneo is leading but only barely. While watching, here are some things I observed:

Larry Fonacier looks like that sidekick guy in Beast Master.

At the end of the first quarter, one of the DLSU players made a three point shot from the OPPOSITE side of the court. And went in. It wasn't counted though since the time ended and the sad thing was that the cameras didn't really catch it since many thought the game was over, so I don't know who made the shot.

There's also this poor DLSU player who got hit at the adam's apple in today's game. In last game, he was stepped on. He's now recuperating.

Thank God Ateneo has balanced players (i.e. not like Shohoku from Slam Dunk who depends on the starting players to carry the game). DLSU, on the other hand, has a "super" player that's great in intercepting, getting goals, and three point shots.

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Before I start, I only noticed yesterday that CCHQ has Zetsu Ai manga... all five volumes. Except the *cute* Miriam girl (whose name I forgot) that I treated out to Bananacue bought #1. That aside...

My first problem was that I had a class from 10:30~11:30 am but had Philo oral signups at 11:00 am. So I had Jamie, one of my classmates and Elbert's pseudo-girlfriend (it's one of those they broke up but are still together thing), sign me up. Of course it also happens she forgot to inform me that today's Philo class was a free cut. I heard about it from *ugh* Rob while I was at the lib steps attending our LitSoc meeting. Of course Philo being my only other class on Fridays, I was actually free to go home at 12 pm. Except that my carpool was at 4:30...

As usual, I was at CCHQ. Wasn't in the mood to read though. Me and Kit agreed to go out and try Pizza Hut's Cheesy Pizza with six kinds of cheese next Wednesday. Also, there were two packs of Chobits pins left. Since the box exactly has 30 pins total (each pack containing two pins) and there are 6 special pins but only 4 have been obtained yet, we deduced that the last two packs each containing a special pin. To test this theory, we had Carlo buy one pack and wouldn't you know it, it had a special pin, glimmering blue.

Saw a girl buy Fruits Basket manga #1~5. That's a lot of money. There's also this girl who bought the Sandman calendar and post cards. A lot of money as well. Their U.S. shipment was set to arrive at 3 pm today. The UPS people came at 2:45. Wow. I'm thinking whether to buy the paperback of The Ultimates.

Khristine told me that Page One had copies of Neil Gaiman's Coraline. So when I got home, I grabbed two one thousand peso bills, ate a quick dinner, and had the driver bring me to Rockwell. Page One has an interesting selection of books. The entire bottom shelf was dedicated to Forgotten Realms books and the shelves are really long. The second to the bottom shelf was filled with Dragonlance books. >.< Anyway, also saw a bunch of Discworld books but they were quite expensive. Also saw a couple of Anita Blake books but they were also expensive, and I already had copies of my own. Saw American Gods, Sandman: Book of Dreams, Smoke and Mirrors, but no Coraline.

Next stop was A Different Bookstore in Glorietta. Suddenly, my two thousand pesos disappeared in the blink of an eye. Got George R. R. Martin's A Crown of Swords trade paperback, T. H. White's Once and Future King, and Defenders of the Faith for my D&D campaigns. It cost me P1951. That's including the 10% discount I already had. Oh yeah, I also got Flip #2 for free. Curious to read it as my teachers (Krip Yuson) and former teachers (Cyan Abad and Danton Remoto) have written articles.

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Right now, I really want to taste Pizza Hut's cheese pizza which has several cheeses in it.

Oh yeah, Khristine was also asking me today how fantasy writers incorporate sex into their books. I told her the only descriptive ones I read were Terry Goodkind and Mercedes Lackey.

Khristine: Mercedes Lackey?!?

Charles: The book was Oathbound. The demon was a pervert.

Khristine: Katya! You read Mercedes Lackey right?

Anyway, I better get out of semi-depression soon before it turns into something worse.

Oh yeah, here's some books I'm looking forward to that's outside my norm:

A Feast of Crows by George R. R. Martin.

Golden Fool by Robin Hobb.

Narcissus in Chains by Laurell K. Hamilton.

And for Tin and Vern, Shadows and Light by Anne Bishop.

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Oh yeah, I forgot to post this yesterday: Ateneo's Lord of the Rings premiere will be on Dec. 21, 2002. And the price will probably be jacked up unless Celadon can find more sponsors since the rights to the movie just went up (it's now costs P400,000).

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Instead of spending the entire day at home, I was in school since I had a consultation with Dr. Brion. I was at CCHQ from 11:30 am ~ 5:30 pm. It's nice to have a place where you could hang out and meet nice people. ^^

Of course by today, there are stories circulating of how Ateneans got their UAAP tickets. Some camped overnight to get a ticket. A couple where at school as early as 3:30 am to line up. Nothing like school spirit to motivate people...

Oh yeah, aside from the Saiyuki Gaiden coming out, Saiyuki Reload manga is also going to be available. Now if only the storm looming over Japan would stop so that transportation would be available...

Zena said that my Ateneo ID pic looked like Shinji. >.< It's awkward because years before, I had to tell people I looked like Shinji instead of them forming that theory on their own.

Tanya finally got her Cho Hakkai plushie. No more Saiyuki plushies at CCHQ. ^^

It's Cherry's birthday! Bought her X #14. I spooked her and Nefer. They told me I was like Mao/Dominic. >.< Now that's not fair. I've been "stalking" people since high school.

Flip issue 2 is out! Crap, my comments server is down.

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There were a series of events today that best describe who I am. Let's start off with...

In a way, I did my bravest thing today. After Fr. Dacanay's class, I didn't take the route from SEC to the overpass that leads to Katipunan. That's usually the route Steph, my crush, takes on Wednesdays as her car is color coded. Last week, I had a reason not to go (group meeting). Today, I didn't have one, so it was all up to me whether to "try" seeing my crush or not. I chose the latter and took my usual route to CCHQ, hoping not to see Steph.

And wouldn't you know it, I run into Steph. >.< I just like to comment that I DO NOT intentionally run off to follow people wherever they go and track their every movement. I'm just observant of my environment. I remember two years ago when Steph was mad at me since I seemed to pop up wherever she went. So I started avoiding her. But only ended up seeing a lot of her. It's unintentional. That's what I tell people. Somehow, they don't seem to believe me. Today is a perfect example of that situation. Didn't want to see Steph but did see her. The more I avoid people, the more I run into them. That's irony for you.

Anyway, talked to Steph and will be loaning her the Hunter x Hunter CDs next week. She's also quite busy as evident in her voice and appearance. Poor her.

I waved goodbye to Steph and headed for the I.S. department hoping I could consult with Dr. Brion so that I don't have to come to consult him tomorrow. Unfortunately, he wasn't there. Guess I'll be going to school tomorrow even if I don't have any class.

I then headed to CCHQ. Saw the cover of Initial D vol. 3. I was just apalled by the name-changing applied to the manga. Tak? Zack? Ugh. And then I noticed there's only one copy left instead of two. I called up Mich to see if she was able to get one. Apparently, she did. And apparently, I called her during her class, in which her phone was not on silent mode. Oooops. But as I said, Mich told me before that she didn't have classes on Wednesdays. How was I supposed to know that today was here make-up class?

Later, John and Carlo were browsing through Previews magazine. There's a new Saiyuki manga coming out. Katherine told us it's being published by a more "daring" publisher. Does that mean more yaoi?

Allow me to interrupt to say that Del Rey is republishing it's Robotech novels, this time in trilogies. The first one will be out in November, I think, featuring the first three novels.

Anyway, Meia was there in CCHQ. I tempted her to ponder on whether to buy the Chobits pins or not. And since I'm in semi-depression (i.e. no one really notices and I look normal instead of the aura I emit in my depressed states), I offered to buy them for her. She declined. I offered again. She still declined. =P

It's only now I realized that Meia studies in U.P.

Charles: Where do you study?

Meia: U.P.

Charles: I thought you studied in Miriam.

Meia: I used to study there. Why?

Charles: You emit a Miriam presence.

Stupid me not to realize that Meia wears civilian outfit instead of Miriam uniform whenever she passes by CCHQ. Of course it also happens only once or twice a week so I assumed it was her free day when she was dropping by CCHQ, hence not in uniform, unlike Tanya who's there nearly every day so I notice when she's in uniform or not.

And then Monica (Mawsi pala...Khristine was shocked when I used that name) and a bunch of other people dropped by. I'm just assuming they're students who graduated from Miriam. And since I'm not good with names, I won't spell them out. To make a long story short, found out Monica doesn't like Justin, Jobert's brother, and is freaked out by their companions (and I presume me included). Meia wanted to tag along with them as she's free lunch at their house as Monica was doing some video editing. And the two ranted about this guy at U.P. Fine Arts who knows Monica and her friends. And this rant about a certain person who signed her Guestbook and is annoying Monica. And about someone using Pam's name to comment or something...

In the confusion with the Miriam students, there was one cute girl whom I saw a couple of weeks before that bought some Yami no Matsuei manga. I managed to see the ID. She's Atenean. Green tag - freshman. Oh well.

When they all left, Haruka/Joy suddenly popped into the store. I didn't know she visited. She was sad and frantic about all the papers she wanted to do. And me wanting to see people's smiles, I offered to buy her manga to cheer her up. And she accepted. And she was browsing through the English manga, which are way more expensive than the Japanese versions (except Tokyo Pop... Tokyo Pop manga is only P600 in contrast to Viz where it might go as high as P1000+). Eventually, she bought the Yu Watase postcards and a pack of Sakura Taisen trading cards. Of course when she went to the cashier, she did comment something about "milking the cow" when I offered to buy her stuff. ^^

Once the purchase was done, she realized it was 2 pm and was late for class. She thanked me and rushed to school. I later received a text message thanking me and then a few more minutes later she called the store to thank me again. See? There's gratitude in generosity. ^^ And I'm some P800 less.

I forgot to mention, I bought for Elbert an After Eden mug that he's been wanting since last week.

Khristine offered to buy me food to cheer me up, since that's what she did with Elbert (yes, there's a depression illness going around). Katherine rang the bell while roaming around CCHQ to drive the depression spirit away (I kid you not). Of course since food is not the way to cheer me up, I just thanked her and she later went off to buy food for her brother who is going to India.

When Khristine got back, she said that it was drizzling. Went back to school wearing my jacket and headed to Bellarmine, where I again saw Elbert. Philo class was fun and hopefully I'll only be having one Philo class next week.

Normally, I'd go home after Philo but I didn't have a ride home. I managed to snag Russ and so I went to the LitSoc meeting even if I told them the other day I wasn't going. The things I do for my org...

They have yummy blueberry cupcakes! And strawberry but I didn't get to taste that. They also had chocolates and chocnut but you know how I'm allergic to that. Tanix and Riasa were there since they're officers. Oh yeah, LitSoc's officers are all female. So when our moderator was looking for members to join the new formation committee which will plan what the org's activities are, the only recruits he got were all guys. Wow. Our officers are all female and our formation committee are all male. Things balance out... in the end.

Got home in time to watch the last episode of Saiyuki. And then went to sleep. I'm exhausted. Yey! Daimira's blog is up again. I love Detective Conan too!!! I got manga #1-8 when I was in fourth year high school for around P250 each. And then I gave them to a friend who loves Detective Conan as well. >.<

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Just finished reading the first trilogy of The Chronicles of Thomas Covenant the Unbeliever. It's dark I tell you.

Well, it's really adult fantasy. Everything is serious and this isn't something you'd give to that ten-year old of yours. A lot of people die and horrible things happen, and when I say horrible, I really mean it.

Let's start with the biggest aspect of the book: the anti-hero protagonist Thomas Covenant. Raistlin has nothing on this guy in terms of angst. Covenant is a leper in our world who's wife divorced him and the people treating him as an outcast. He's angry at the world and apathetic. And this is the hero supposed to save "The Land". Of course it also happens that he doesn't believe The Land exists. It soon becomes a struggle for sanity since how can save a world he doesn't believe in?

The Land doesn't have elves or dwarves or dragons but it has its own repertoire of fantastic elements. There are the giants who are strong and wise except that they refuse to fight and are great storytellers. They are also seafarers and live very long lives. Then there are the Ramhyn, sentient horses who are being cared for by humans called Ramen. And there's hurtloam, soil that cures most illnesses... including Covenant's leprosy which makes it dangerous for him since in the real world, he's still a leper and must not let his guard down.

Throughout the course of the story, evil wins. There's this villain whose name is Lord Foul and is the embodiment of Despair. Eventually, everyone, including Covenant, ends up doing what he wants. If you're thinking there's a God that will save their world, you're only partly correct. There is a God but he can't interfere as it violates the freedom he gave The Land. Once he intervenes, Lord Foul wins. So it's left to Covenant to save them...

Except Covenant is a double-edged sword. The people know he has the power to either save them or destroy them in his hands, literally. Except he doesn't know how and throughout the story, has given people pain left and right. He does atrocious acts, make no mistake. Covenant is The anti-hero. The people only hope he'll save them but over the course of the book, people start to lose faith. It's not your standard epic fantasy fare.

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I'm sure no one is really interested in my emotional state right now but in case anyone's curious...

I'm in despair. Yup, I'm living life like the hopeless maggot I am. Not to worry though, I'm not in the depressive state where it's obvious or I'm emitting this aura of sadness. But still, that doesn't change my situation. How do I know for sure?

Ummm, when I'm going on a rampant spree buying stuff for other people, you know something's wrong. I was even *gasp* thinking of buying for Garrick the Robotech comics that's going to come out. And just to tease Arcina for telling on Sheila a story which she did not reveal the full details, I won't tell her what I got her (who knows, maybe I actually didn't get her something). Anyway, right now, I'm pondering on what to get for Ela's upcoming birthday. I'm the type of person who wants to give to people who constantly decline. ^^ Speaking of person who constantly decline...

Sheila Sheila Sheila! Not Minami but the Sheila who is Tchan's batchmate and Arcina's friend. Grrrrr. What can I get her? Long time no see...

*sigh*

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Lalalalala. Errors at blogland.

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Ack! Blogger is giving me problems.

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Basically, Garr, Pam, Joan, read my comments. ^^

Grrrr. Livejournal is giving me a headache.

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I forgot to mention how it baffles me that Sheila found out I was kept in the trunk of a car. That happened during Ngo Dee's birthday party and he was treating us out to Counterstrike and dinner. Yes, I fit in the trunk of a car. Yes, someone else and me could fit in the trunk of a car. How did Sheila find out? Unless Arianna told Arcina who told Sheila...

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Before I start: Pam - Ela says she misses you. =p

Just came back from visiting my alma matter to hand Tchan her Slam Dunk artbook. Apparently, I walk faster than I did three years ago as it only took me twenty minutes to get from my house to school whereas it used to take me half an hour.

So there I was, standing in the sun at 3:30 pm waiting for Tchan to arrive at Starbucks. Twenty minutes later, she finally appears with her boytoy...errrr, boyfriend...errrr, prom date. ^^ She then tells me to talk and not stare at her. People, I am NR - No Reaction. Contrary to popular belief, I am shy and timid. Even Daimira (whose blog exceeded her bandwidth... should we be happy or sad?) was surprised when she first met me. I am not a vocal person. ^^

Anyway, in the twenty minutes I spent waiting for Tchan, I saw two of my former Math teachers emerge out of Starbucks. Mr. Abcede and Mrs. San Andres. It's nice to know I can still remember the names of my teachers despite the fact that I haven't seen them for the past three years and I'm really bad with names. I waved at them and they did wave back. They probably didn't recognize me with my long hair and all. Too bad I wasn't wearing my contacts. ^^

And then Xaverians come out to head for Starbucks and I see Dice's ex boyfriend, Michael Ngo Dee. I say hi, say a few words, and he leaves.

Backing up to where I left off, Tchan introduced me to her *ahem* prom date and gave her the Slam Dunk artbook. Naturally, she's surprised at my long hair. They then drag me to Starbucks where I watch them sip their coffee and frap. Then Sheila (Tan) enters. She's cute as usual and I wave at her. It took her a moment to realize who I was. Naturally, reaction is how long my hair is and how thin I am.

Sheila: Charles! You're thinner than I last saw you.

Charles: That's impossible. I never gained/lost weight since grade seven. I'm not thinner.

Alas, it's been awhile since I last saw Sheila and Tchan. They're cuter than I remember them. =P Anyway, after some quick chitchat, Sheila left and Tchan was worried about the time during the entire conversation.

When we finally escorted Tchan to her campus, I'm left with her *cough* *cough* prom date. He asks me where my car was.

Guy: So where's your car parked?

Charles: I was serious when I told Tchan that I walked from my house...

Guy: Let them give you a ride.

Charles: No thanks. I want to browse through the malls shops here.

Yup, the Ortigas section has changed in three years. Back in my time, Starbucks wasn't directly outside Xavier. We had to walk all the way to the gas station near Wilson and the only fast food shop outside the school was Burger King. Anyway, there's a puzzle shop in Ortigas (Steph would surely love that) and I visited the gaming shop there. Nothing spectacular, same layout as Neutral Grounds. I guess I won't be finding Mindtrap games there.

I also discover that Zagu doesn't have the one flavor I crave: cherry. Oh well. And I didn't know Tchan had a working blog. >.<

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The beauty of having no classes is that you can sleep in the entire morning... which I did more or less.

Anyway, was caught up last night by C.S.I. reruns on AXN. I actually had to choose whether to watch Boston Public or C.S.I. Alas, the latter won.

And then at around midnight, I watched Fear Factor. What made this episode interesting is that the food challenge during the second competition was... balot! I mean the Westerners were agonizing over eating the egg but somehow, they all manage to do so. See? Balot isn't so bad is it? I'm impressed at one girl though. She ate the entire thing in one bite.

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Sleepy. That's what I felt waking up at 8 am since I did sleep at 1:30 am. What was I doing during the evening? Rewriting our Theo paper.

It's a good thing I finished writing our Theo paper last night. Fr. Dacanay was angry since eleven students were absent from class today. He gave a surprise quiz worth three quizzes.

Question #1: What is the date today?

Question #2: What is the day today?

Question #3: Who won yesterday's game?

After Theo, I went to CCHQ to buy Tchan's Slam Dunk artbook. Ooops, my mistake. It doesn't cost P2300. It's only P1850. ^^ And they already ordered the Backgammon artbook although who knows when it'll arrive.

Speaking of shipments, CCHQ's shipments got lost somewhere in Canada because the UPS abroad installed a new computer system and it's far from perfect. The only stuff that they got was the American manga like Chobits #3 and Initial D #3 and their freebie magazines. And Previews. Let's not forget Previews. But for the single issues, alas, they will hopefully arrive next week.

Of course when I came back to school for Philosophy class, saw some of my classmates headed for the opposite direction. Apparently, our teacher didn't show up for his earlier classes so we headed for the Philo department to ask. We ran into him and he said that there won't be class today. He then asked me what we were doing there. I told him we were going to ask if there's class today. He then told me he's headed for the German embassy.

After killing one hour by pestering Jamie, Digi, and Elbert, I find out that my 3 hour poetry class is cancelled. Krip came in his van with what is presumably his son inside. He then told me not to miss next meeting and posted a sign that there won't be classes today. Great, I now had to find a ride home.

Fortunately, the driver was already there but I ran into Ela, Izza, and Rain, who are looking for tickets on Saturday's UAAP finals.

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Crap. Now I have to cram our Theo paper. Anyway, true to the suspense of any basketball game, DLSU won the game today so it'll be a DLSU vs ADMU game next week. Don't know the date though. I guess we're having a pre lectio quiz tomorrow for Philo.

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Apparently, Sunday is accident day. Last week, I, my person, almost collided with a car if it weren't for my reflexes and calm thinking (I almost got into an accident a decade ago and I panicked then... it's good to know I've learned from that experience). Today, going home from church, our car was hit by a truck from behind.

Of course I was sitting at the backseat of the car, at the left side, just where the truck happened to bump us. It's a good thing that the truck wasn't traveling at high speeds or else I would have been dead. I mean I was sitting in the car, leaning my shoulder against the door when I suddenly felt a rumble and some shaking. It couldn't be a speed bump since it happened too long. Before I knew it, a truck was beside me, nearly squishing the door. The driver didn't really notice it. He felt something and asked me what was wrong. I said that we were hit by the truck.

People are now fussing over me: the maids, my mother, my brother. They keep offering me water as if I was in shock. I wasn't. Heck, after the accident, I walked home since I didn't want to waste time with the police report. After all, it wasn't me driving the car. Of course three hours later, mother comes in asking me if I wanted water and if I'm okay. There I was, sitting at the sofa, reading Stephen R. Donaldson's Illearth War. What does it look like?

Thank God that our cable is working again. It was probably down for twenty four hours so I wasn't able to watch TV since yesterday. People are anticipating today's match between DLSU and Ateneo. Who will win? *shrug* My only consolation is that if Ateneo wins, our Philo quiz will be about a subject matter we've already discussed.

And just to clarify, I'm really not anti-Tolkien. Anti C.S. Lewis maybe, but not anti-Tolkien. Garrick, let's face it, Tolkien's work is several years old. I'm not complaining about the world or the plot as it's evidently good. I'm complaining about the writing and how it didn't really appealed to me. Read it and found it so-so. Writing evolves over time. You don't see us reading Old English work without some agony. I mean sure, Tolkien's Lord of the Rings might end up as a classic but even classics aren't as enjoyable to some people. I mean in the horror genre, we can talk about Bram Stoker and Mary Shelley (haven't read the novels so I can't really comment on the work) but horror readers enjoy the likes of R.L. Stine and Stephen King. Similarly, for all of Sir Arthur Conan Doyle's stories about Sherlock Holmes (which I've read and enjoy, FYI), mystery fans love Agatha Christie. That's not to say Doyle's work is less significant but there is an evolution that makes new, imaginative ideas more appealing (and factually accurate as Doyle makes an error in one of his works, like Holmes deducing from a hat that the owner is smart because the circumference is big and a big head must contain a big brain... intelligence is measured from the folds of the brain as well as the size).

Then again, since everyone is different, this is just my opinion and my take on it. You're probably a product of Tolkien's time and so really enjoy it. I guess I was just raised in a period where I only got to read Tolkien in my teens (dammit, the Xavier school library only has a copy of Fellowship of the Ring and the last few pages have been torn) and find other styles more appealing. I won't be surprised if ten or twenty years from now, my favorite writers will be considered obsolete by the next generation of fantasy readers.

I guess the irony here is that a creative concept eventually stops being creative after a certain amount of time because it's potential is already exploited. Which is why if someone does another Blair Witch, it probably won't be as successful as the original unless there's an innovative or enticing characteristic.

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