I'm exhausted. I was so exhausted that I didn't wake up for Saiyuki (although I had the VCR record it) at 7 am. Didn't even bother reading my emails... just turned on the computer to download them and then headed for school.

Can't say anything spectacular happened yesterday. Same old routine: theology, CCHQ, philosophy, carpool home. With the exception of my blockmates greeting me (Coni even told it to Fr. Dacanay, who just shrugged) and the occassional text message coming in at various hours.

Managed to get home at 5 pm and then I hit the sack. Woke up at 6:30 since we had to eat out, no matter how much I've been protesting for the past ten years.

Dad: Where do you want to eat?

Me: Kitaro.

Dad: No, no, no. Where do you want to eat?

Me: Kitaro.

Dad: Where do you want to eat?

Me: Kitaro.

And then later in the car when we fetched my mom:

Mom: Where do you want to eat?

Me: Kitaro.

Mom: Daddy doesn't want that place. Daddy, where are we eating?

Dad: Sugi.

Wow. And they even bother asking me. It's the simple things in life that make you happy. My parents refuse to believe that. I mean for the past ten years, when I'm asked to eat out, I just say at home. Since I knew that would fail, I offered to eat Dim Sum last year. Father consented, after much argument. This year, I chose mom's restaurant. But would dad consent? Nooooooo. Because we have to eat in a fancy and expensive place. And he tells me that we're not rich. I think people just say that in case some thief is overhearing the conversation.

At least dad was right in one aspect. When it comes to food, the family comes to shambles. He was making a criticism last Sunday about how mom's side of the family always argue when it comes to dinner or a place to eat. A pity dad doesn't see his own reflection as well. Then again, my family only believes what it wants to believes.

And of course, in the restaurant, my dad and brother pester me again about driving. And they ask me why I'm in a foul mood.

When my dad wants to talk to me, there are only seven reasons behind this: 1) wants to inquire if I'm "here", 2) wants me to learn Chinese, 3) wants me to learn to drive, 4) wants me to eat a lot, 5) gives me money, 6) wants me to wear new clothes/shoes, or 7) wants my room cleaned up.

My mother, on the other hand, has also seven reasons for talking to me: 1) gives us our allowances, 2) wants something taped, 3) wants to arrange the schedule of the car, 4) wants me to eat a lot, 5) wants me to try something she's "cooked", 6) wants my hair cut, or 7) wants to tell me something my dad wants to tell me (see paragraph above).

And while my family eats out together every Sunday at our grandmother's house, I leave the table as soon as I finish my dinner (five minutes) and people don't even notice I'm gone. They're usually busy gossiping about the actors, actresses, politics, and the latest trends. There's no depth in my relation with my family. They don't even listen to me.

Anyway, I have to reply to emails now. Oh yeah, haven't seen Steph during the week except last Tuesday. It's perhaps for the best. Time for me to get over, time for me to move on... it's different knowing you have no chance at all.